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5-15-22


The Almighty Chase Peck wins Nintendo Switch Sports bowling with a score of 213
We are all rooting for you, Chase!

Grandma forever. Today began as an unassuming day; I woke up, fell back to sleep, woke up again, did not eat breakfast, and played Nintendo Switch Sports with my younger brother. It started out rough. We played online Survival Bowling a few times but kept getting eliminated in the first round. I was frustrated; my brother was indifferent. He got bored and quit, leaving me by my lonesome.

But that's when I found it. I found the Sweet Spot. Position your Mii slightly off-center, to the left. Orientate yourself -- point towards the gap between pins 1 and 3, but more so towards pin 1. Strike. Every time. (Chase Peck is not responsible for any claims, true or false, made in this post.)

This tactic landed me a score of 213 during one game. Disregarding the fact that it was a tie for first, I was first. The New York Times was at my door in an instant. I stepped out of my house; handsome guys lined up to ask for my number. A limousine was already in my driveway. We drove from my home in Pennsylvania to Hollywood in 0.00001158993 seconds, thanks to the new lightspeed automobile technology. The red carpet was rolled out for me; I walked out, and I was almost assassinated. I truly am a celebrity.

Remember, if you stay determined and put in some elbow grease, you too will be grandma forever in no time.